Nowadays we have so many tools to make our dating experience so much easier. There is online dating that helps us meeting new people from all over the world. We can schedule our dates even when you’re miles away from each other. Though when you are meeting each other in real life there is still a question about who should pay on a first date?
Traditionally, it’s been men who took that responsibility, though the times change and nowadays neither men nor women think that it’s really necessary. There are many women who may be offended by the idea of a man paying for their dinner. At the same time, there are so many of those who still think it’s the man’s place to pay for a date.
So, who is right in this case? Are there any situations when it’s better for a woman to pay for a dinner? Or is it still a man’s responsibility?
Stick to traditions
If we come back to the ancient times, it’s clear that a man was the one who was responsible for providing food and necessary comfort to a woman. However, it’s the 21st century now and the traditions start changing as well. Not every woman wants to feel weak and dependent on a man and they show it in every way possible.
The thing is that in many countries it’s an etiquette rule that a man should pay for a woman on a date. Though not everyone is truly happy about it. Some guys say they would love to pay for a girl on a first date if they could guarantee that she’ll at least call them back. Some women feel uncomfortable as well, as in most cases it’s the first or the second time they see this person, so they don’t really know how to act in such situations.
Remember an episode of the famous series “How I Met Your Mother” where Ted says he loves when a woman wants to share the bill. He is going to pay for this dinner anyway but showing that you are willing to share the expenses make a lot of men look differently at you.
Who was the initiator?
There is another etiquette rule saying that the person who should pay the bill is the one who was the initiator of this meeting (that means choosing the place and the table). In most cases, it’s considered to be a man simply because he is the one to invite a woman on a date and usually the one who picks the place they are going to visit. Though, if this date is initiated by a woman it’s totally okay that the bill will be paid by the woman as well.
Have a diverse date
If you, as a woman, don’t feel comfortable when your date pays the whole bill for the dinner, you can make the situation more diverse and comfortable at the same time. If your man is paying for the dinner you can invite him to your favorite cafe for a cup of coffee and pay for that. Or you can pay for the dessert. Or spontaneously visit a cinema and pay for the tickets. You don’t need to feel like you own him something but if you feel equal with your date, you can feel comfortable by sharing the expenses.
It would never be a bad idea to offer your date sharing the bill on a first date since you still don’t know each other well. And if you’re not sure how to act in this situation, you better talk about it with your partner. Your date might have a different point of view on this “paying issue”, so it’s better when you both are satisfied with what you got.