Online dating tips: how to break the ice with the first message

Online dating tips: how to break the ice with the first message

The main rule you should know while dating online is that first messages matter! Most of the first messages are either lame, or boring and impersonal. However, the first message is extremely important as it’s exactly the time when your match decides if he/she should chat with you or not. 

The first thing to remember while dating online is saying no to pickup lines. Only a few of them are really good and others would make your interlocutor feel awkward and uncomfortable. Not even saying that most of them are simply lame. So, instead of starting with a pickup line, think of using an opening line. 

Read also: Best Advice How to Chat on Online Dating Sites


Start with simple ‘Hi!’

The trick is that you need to add something more to that message. Saying simply ‘hi’ or ‘hello’ is too impersonal. Use ‘hi’ as an ice-breaker and then make your match want to talk to you back. The best tip for that is to ask them something:

Hi there, how are you?

Hi! How are you doing today?

Hi, any fun plans for the weekend?

Saw your profile and just had to say hi.

What’s up?


Start with a joke

Just, please, not the dirty one! And also try to avoid the ‘knock knock’ jokes. Even though some people really like them, the research shows that this type of jokes gets 2% fewer messages. It also doesn’t have to be a joke-joke. You can simply say hello in some funny way:

That awkward moment when you try to message a guy/girl and all you can think of is hello.

I’m the good kind of weird. How about you?

I’d decided to give up on finding my soulmate until I saw your profile.


Start with a question to break the ice

Discovering what you have in common right away is a good way to start a conversation. Don’t forget to mention something that you’ve noticed in their profile. And don’t mention again topics that are already described in their profile. It would give a bad impression to your match.

You’ve mentioned that you like rock music. Me too! What is your favorite band?

What’s one thing I should know about you that’s not on your profile?

I love hearing other people’s stories. Do you have a good one to tell?

What’s your idea of the perfect day?


Start with a compliment

It’s always a good way to start a conversation and make someone to like you, though there is a fine line between being a nice person and being corny. Try to avoid physical complements like ‘hot’, ‘sexy’, ‘beautiful’ and use words describing personal characteristics like ‘nice’, ‘amazing’, ‘fascinating’. Also, don’t focus too much on their photo but on the profile. It would be more valuable if you mention their interests and hobbies than a profile picture. 

You’ve visited so many countries! Good job 😉 

Your favorite book is the one I wanted to read for a long time! Does it worth it?

I like how much you’ve done for homeless people. You are a really kind person!


Read also: 5 Tips to Make the Most out of Online Dating

Knowing how to use ice-breaking in a right way would really help you to make your first message amazing and make a good first impression. These online dating tips will let you be successful while chatting on dating sites and maybe even in a real life 😉

Want to use your new skills now? Install Meetville app on Android right now and go on a date with local singles!

Online dating tips: how to break the ice with the first message
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Alex Glover

Alex Glover

Alex Glover

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4 thoughts on “Online dating tips: how to break the ice with the first message”

  • I think this is one of the most vital information for me.
    And i am glad reading your article. But wanna remark on some
    general things, The website style is ideal, the articles is really
    great : D. Good job, cheers

  • I love your article and agree with most the stuff you talk about, but I dont understand why you would be morally obligated to tell somebody exactly what direction youre heading before sex. I think its your own responsibillity to ask somebody about their intentions if you only want to have sex on the pre-assumption that youre starting a monogamous relationship. You shouldnt lie about what you want, but you also dont have to tell things nobody asked for. Cause that way youre also assuming that everybody wants a commited relationship with you and not just some fun or something open or whatever, which is a little arogant. Hope to hear about your thoughts on this, thank you :)

  • Actually take the time to read someone’s profile before sending that first message. I know a lot of us are quick on the draw when it comes to messaging people who catch our eye, but it helps to actually know something about that person before you message them. And, from the feedback I’ve gotten from real online daters, we know that’s exactly what most online daters want you to do.

  • Breaking the ice—in any situation—is no easy feat. Whether you’re approaching someone at a bar, a party, or online, putting yourself out there can be an awkward and scary experience, even for people who are naturally outgoing.Finding the right words to start a conversation can be hard, especially if you’re talking to a stranger on a dating app.

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