When you have kids, life changes in the blink of an eye. You find yourself caring for the life of another person, and many of the activities and habits you used to have could get lost in the transition. Along with these transitions, you may notice changes in your body and the way you interact with your spouse. Although many things may be more difficult now, your sex life does not have to be one of them. Try not let the wheels fall off, all is not lost.
Talk About It
Leave nothing off the table. You may be feeling extra hormonal, tired from lack of sleep, or wishing you had your pre-baby body back. It is important to let your spouse know how you are feeling. No one wants to be rejected, especially in the bedroom. Spend some time having an open dialogue about what each other is going through. Compassion and an appreciation for one another will help get your intimacy back off the ground.
Make A Plan
Schedule a time, well in advance, on a calendar that works for the both of you. It will give you something to look forward to and having something pre-set, will keep it from getting lost in the crazy day to day of having kids. By planning ahead, you can do all the little things that will free up your time and make sure your body is primed and ready to go. Once you set the date and time, try to get an extra hour of sleep the night before. You will be energized and excited. Eat fruits and vegetables the day off to not feel bogged down by carbs.
Destress and Relax
Motherhood is never without its stresses, and it can be hard to find time to settle in with your partner when your parental responsibilities are keeping you busy. It is important that you try to destress when you can, even if it is only for a few moments. Before you can spend time with your partner, you need to take some time for yourself to relax and feel at ease. The Headspace works great because it is an app you can easily use on your smartphone. It offers five to twenty-minute meditations for basically any type of mood or situation you are in. Meditation can lower your anxiety, improve your mood, and help with mindfulness. This will allow you to be both physically and emotionally present while spending intimate time with your spouse. Just spending a short time practicing meditation can truly make a difference.
Check Your Man
Men deal with having children in very different ways than women. Often their testosterone levels drop, making it difficult to hold an erection long enough for sex. Sildenafil helps to relax blood vessels and send blood to all the right spots for a man to be at the top of his game. Hims is a telemedicine company that connects men with online physicians who will discreetly send you Sildenafil after answering a few questions. No need to wait at a doctors office or have embarrassing in-person conversations. Your man will be more confident and any type of performance anxiety will be gone.
All in all, there are plenty of ways to get the spark back between you and your mate and reconnect. It starts with taking a look at yourself and finding where the opportunity lies.
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