Abusive relationships don’t just happen all of a sudden. On the contrary, they grow and evolve. By definition, relationship abuse is a pattern of abusive and coercive behaviors used to maintain power and control over a former or current intimate partner. It’s a long-term process that tends to escalate over time.
Although it sounds terrifying, the evolving nature of abusive behavior can actually help you to figure things out on time and terminate the relationship before it escalates. In this post, we will show you 10 signs that you are stuck in the abusive relationship.
Having an argument with your partner is completely natural, but verbal insults are a boundary no one has the right to cross. Relationship counselors at the essay writing service explained it briefly: “An abuser will use every opportunity to insult you. Nothing is good enough – your looks, style, education, or behavior. The goal is to make you feel less worth and destroy your notion of self-esteem”.
Relationship abuse is always a two-faced game. Namely, abusers are good manipulators who claim their anger and wrongdoing comes as a direct result of partner’s misbehavior. In such circumstances, many victims start believing abusers and accept their cruelty.
But you don’t want to accept it. Stay calm and rational and think about the problem. Do you really believe you are to blame for this? If not, don’t accept the guilt and don’t let the partner harass you.
An average abuser cannot accept the fact that you want to meet other people, including your friends and family. Such individuals are highly possessive, so you might end up isolated from your colleagues, family, and acquaintances. It’s one of the first signs of emotional abuse and you should try to resist it immediately to prevent further escalation.
Placement of Blame
An abusive partner is never the one who would accept blame for anything. Such person will always find a way to prove that you made a mistake, however big or small it might be. This could seem cute and childish at first, but don’t fall into the trap or else he’ll start blaming you for much bigger and more important things in life.
Abusive partners are essentially insecure, so they need a victim to exercise power and authority. Besides being insecure, they are also jealous of success or even attempts to get something going in your life. It’s an alarm clock that should wake you up and warn you about the abusive partner.
Humiliation and jealousy go hand in hand with each other. An abusive partner will always seize the opportunity (even if there isn’t one!) to humiliate you and show you are worthless. This type of abuse is usually progressing over time, becoming the everyday habit of an abuser.
We already mentioned that abusive partners are manipulators, but we should add that their goal is not only to isolate you but also to alienate you from family and friends. The abuser knows these people are your closest supporters, so he slanders your best friends and family members. What is his goal? Abusive partner wants to alienate you completely and establish himself as the only lighthouse in your life.
You will hardly ever face an abusive behavior in public. That’s because aggressive partners make calculated outbursts in order to hide from other people. Everything looks good on the outside, but you are facing the terror back home. In this case, you should ask yourself one thing – why these outbursts keep happening only in private? The answer is simple: abusers are hiding their real face from other people.
Abusers will always try to instill fear and make subtle threats. Your partner could intimidate you using harsh words or even aggressive body language. He is not crossing the border yet, but there is obviously a chance it could happen sometime soon. If this is happening in your life right now, you should end the relationship before something goes terribly wrong.
This is the final stage of abusive behavior in a relationship. It’s also evolving and becoming more severe over time, particularly if you neglect the problem and convince yourself that quick slap a few days ago was not a big deal. Don’t let it fool you – aggression and violence won’t stop and you must end this relationship immediately.
Relationship abuse is a process that keeps evolving over time, putting you both under mental and physical pressure. So many people find excuses for it, but you have every right to live happily and get away from such disastrous relationship.
It is really important to have a full understanding of the problem, so we showed you 10 signs that you are in the abusive relationship. Remember these indicators and keep in mind that being single is much better than wasting your time with the abuser!
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