Family members – especially children – can be overly critical when it comes to a new relationship for you. They have their own issues with the loss of your prior partner whether it is through death or divorce, so it’s especially problematic when you’ve found someone you want to pursue for a relationship.
The reaction of grown children to their parent dating again can be one of the biggest obstacles you face. It’s hard enough for them to picture their mom and dad in a romantic liaison in their heyday – it’s especially difficult for them to see you as a vibrant, healthy, sexual being.
Some grown children simply have a difficult time understanding that their parents are real human beings with the same feelings and needs as younger singles, so they may tend to discourage any budding romance.
These same grown children may also be reacting out of concern for their parent, feeling a need to protect him/her from being taken advantage of. This may certainly be a valid concern, but if the senior in question is of sound and healthy mind, interference should be minimal at best.
You need to concentrate on you and what’s best for you. Hopefully, you have a good enough relationship with your children to be able to talk openly and honestly about your desire to continue living instead of waiting to die.
Explain to them that having a person in your life other than them is important to you. Tell them that you still have a lot of living to do and you don’t want to do it alone.
Often your grown children may feel like a potential date is using you or simply after your financial assets. Reassure them that you will be very careful in this area and you will not be taken advantage of.
Ultimately, you have to think about yourself and what will make you happy. Sure, the opinion of your children is important to you, but your opinion of yourself needs to be in the forefront.
Your children are grown and they have lives of their own. Point out to them that you have worked hard to get where you are and dating is important for you to feel needed, wanted, and alive.
Display your own confidence in yourself and your dating abilities. Show them that you know what you are doing and that, despite their misgivings, you will be just fine. You’ve earned the right to be happy and you are going for it!