Total users: 65,043,839 Online users: 234,408

Ofelia, 35

United States, Missouri, Bethany

Offline, last seen Sat, 03 Oct 2026 18:10:44

About Me

• I’m a superhero. Special power: I go invisible in large crowds and hallways. (My daughter claims it’s because I’m short. Wtf does she know, she’s 16.)• I don’t have a single tattoo. I’m not opposed, I just wish they were animated.• I love tattoos! Head to toe.• I am not politically correct.• I hear “MOMMMM... YOU CAN’T SAY THAT!” every single day. I usually respond “ohhhh... F*ck!”. If there’s such thing as social Tourette’s, I might have it.• Two piercings. One there ? and one there ?• If you’re 6ft or taller, I will laugh at you if you’re scared of heights.• I hate pubic hair. On the body is gross. On toilet seats, bathtubs, floors, pillows, it’s freaken disgusting!• I hate crowds... But if there’s live music and a couple beers, I’M IN! I absolutely love live music.• I don’t recycle. I’m not opposed to it, I just don’t do it.• I’m hella excited about the zombie apocalypse. Team Zombie!• I do have a checklist for what I definitely don’t want in my life (see below). Otherwise, you’re golden.• I’m not looking for a dad for my daughter, and I don’t want your babies. I had one, I got fixed, end of. Please note: I don’t have the ex parent baggage or the freak child who makes life miserable for anyone I date. She’s respectful, welcoming and independent.• I’ve never had a hamburger. Yes I’m vegetarian. No it’s not about the animals. I’d eat them bloody, they just make me sick.• I don’t want to go hunting or fishing with you. Wait! If it’s hunting Sasquatch.... HELLS YEAH! F*CK YEAH!. Driving to the mountains to put a pole and some string in some water... no. Never.• I’ve never drank a cup of coffee. I like my tea. I don’t care what you eat or drink.• I don’t cook.• People smell. Especially Elevator People. Bus People are the worst.• My English is crap. I wish it was because it’s my second language. It’s not, I don’t know any other languages.• There’s a reason I don’t have loads of photos. I’m shy, and fatter then average (not beached whale fat, jeeze). If we meet, don’t be heartbroken when you don’t see a model. Just being honest.• Been told I smile too much. Dimples are deceiving, like now actually. They make you look like you’re smiling, even in those “oh f*ck, what have I gotten myself into” moments.• I’m not controlling or one of those women that freaks out about you going out with friends. Enjoy life, and your friends.• Not only do I drive, but I drive a stick. Bus People smell awful, remember? I do drive an orange jeep. Yes, I know it looks like a midget bus, it makes me smile.• I’m socially awkward so I need someone who isn’t, because well… it’s just easier that way. • Oh, and I swear.It might sting a little... Or a lot.• You must not live in mommy’s or daddy’s home/garage/basement/car/tent because it’s free. And FFS please don’t call them mommy or daddy!• You must know how to do your laundry and know how to put a sheet on the bed.• Hopefully you drive, and I don’t care what you drive. I won’t be impressed if your car is straight off the set of the fast and the furious. Equally, I won’t be impressed that you ride your bicycle to work because it’s “good for the environment”.• No criminals please.. wait, I guess it depends on the crime and situation. We’ll talk.• No virgins, or nearly virgins. I don’t want you if you’ve only had one or two girlfriends… and that was around high school…. but she really loved you…. because she talked to you that once, so you stalked her… but that doesn’t count because you were in the area anyway o.O• If you look like you belong on a rapist/child molester warning poster, I’m not interested.• You must not see “shadow people” or have been abducted by aliens.• Bald men are sexy, balding men look like they’re on the poster I mentioned earlier.• Please, if you’re socially awkward, don’t message me. It’s hard enough already.

PERSONAL INFORMATION

  • Looking for

    man

  • Relationship

    Never married

  • Have kids

    No

  • Wants kids

    No

  • Ethnicity

    Caucasian

  • Faith

    Spiritual but not religious

  • Body type

    Curvy

  • Height

    5'2"

  • Eye color

    Hazel

  • Smoke

    No

  • Drink

    Yes, socially

INTERESTS

Documentary Drama Martial Arts Mystery Dance Golf Sailing
Wink Icon color PERSONAL INFORMATION Fave
Chat

SIMILAR PEOPLE

Great
stars 4.1 out of 5 based Rated 4.1 / 5 Based  on  377 reviews
  • Shannon from Bethany | Woman | 33 years old | Aquarius
    Shannon

    Offline

    Woman. 33 years old. Zodiac sign: Aquarius.

    Looking for: man. In age: 30-40

    I am very outgoing and down to earth.I love to live life and half fun at the fullest.I like to go fishing and do anything outdoorsy.I love to laugh and joke around but I know when to be serious.I lik differet kinds of music,mainly rock and rap.I am adventurious.I also like to watch movies and jus chill when the mood is right.I like scary movies.I love tattoos and pierings.I only have a few tattooz myself but love the art and meaning of them.I am going to persue going back to school for cosmitoligy to do hair.I love doin hair and make up and making otha plp feel good about themselves.if you want to have fun and or get to know me please contact me on my account.thanks brandy :-) A good first date idea for me would be to go to diner with a man and jus get to know them and then maybe a movie or puttputt golf or playing pool or darts or sumthing like that to have a little fun.

    Chat
  • Desirae from Bethany | Woman | 32 years old | Capricorn
    Desirae

    Offline

    Woman. 32 years old. Zodiac sign: Capricorn.

    Looking for: man. In age: 29-39

    I don't really know what to say about myself. I'm a single mom to a wonderful eight year old boy. I work full time as a RN ***nights per week and would like to go back to school in the near future. My work schedule is def not "normal", it can get pretty busy (so you might not hear from me for a few days at a time) but can also be really nice b/c I can get 5 or 6 days off without taking time off. My marriage ended pretty recently (we get along & parent well together, just weren't good at being married to each other) so I haven't dated in a very, very long time, & I'm not really sure what I'm looking to get out of this right now, but I'm up for trying something new. I'm not "looking" for anything serious, but that doesn't mean I'm not open to it. I think it would be good to just hang out at first & see if a friendship develops.On a side note, if you don't have knowledge of basic grammar (correct usage of their, they're, there & your vs you're), we're probably not going to click. Also, you should be wearing a shirt in your profile pic. Something casual... I'm a jeans & t-shirt kind of girl :)

    Chat
  • Abrianna from Bethany | Woman | 31 years old | Capricorn
    Abrianna

    Offline

    Woman. 31 years old. Zodiac sign: Capricorn.

    Looking for: man. In age: 28-38

    Hey dolls!! I'm Christi, I'm a sweetheart by nature....my daughter is the most important thing to me after that my family and friends. I've been single for a few years now, I was in a 12 yr relationship so being single has been REALLY GREAT! I actually am not lonely or in desperate need of a companion (although it would be nice) I am actually quite happy with my life right now but would of course welcome something more if it came my way ;) I would ideally like to find someone who I can be friends with and grow from there, I believe in love but also know from experience that no real relationship will last unless you are with someone who after the puppy dog love wears off you actually like, love tends to blind you. I have a mortgage, car, job, and go to school fulltime. I would like someone who has goals and who is constantly striving to reach them as I do. Who knows maybe I'll find a keeper in here? I'm an open book ;)

    Chat
See more
Follow Us: