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Hildegarde, 29
United States, New Jersey, Oaklyn

Offline, last seen Sun, 18 May 2025 02:34:01

About Me

Uhhh...I am really sarcastic. My friends would tell you I'm funny, if I paid them enough. I REFUSE to " lol ", it feels completely unnatural to me (and reminds me of the old dial-up days of AOL for some reason...). Sushi is overrated. I enjoy writing strongly worded letters and "stickin' it to The Man" when I can. (One of my MANY useful but nevertheless unmarketable skills...). I enjoy being creative and original. I'd consider myself spontaneous...as long as I know ahead of time. (Seriously, how else will I know what shoes to wear?) I really, really, REALLY love my dog. :)The following section is just my senseless ranting about this website and the people who use it...you. Written in 20 or so minutes after being on here for a week. Read at your own risk.Ohhhhh the pages I could write on all the rediculous things I've found over and over again in your profiles... Here are some of my favorites:1. Your Headline reads something like: "Insert clever headline here". WOW! HAHAHA! SO CLEVER! Ummmmm, No. I must see that headline on at least 20% of profiles. But thanks for pointing out your lack of originality and laaaaame sense of humor.2. You leave your entire Description and Interests sections blank, save for something like, "I really hate describing myself. Anything you want to know just ask. I'm an open book" or "I have way too many interests to list". How the hell do you expect some stranger to even begin to ask you anything when she knows literally nothing about you? Even if there's a picture of you surfing..."Uhhh so you surf? Yeah. Cool. Uhhhhh..." Okay, good talk. Goooood talk.3. Copy & Paste ***? ;/ Do you think we can't tell? When your initial contact consists of you blabbering on about all your interests (which by the way HAS a place, in your Interests section!!!) and some ambiguous compliment clearly having nothing to do with anything specific to MY profile ***you're obviously waiting for statistics to work in your favor... If 1 out of every 1 million girls respond positively to this lazy and insincere pick-up attempt, then gosh darnit, you've got a buttload of *** send! ~~"So you're sayin' there's a chance...?!"4. Your pictures. Ohhh man this needs its own section in my rant... ~You have 1 or 2 pictures total... Over the course of one's lifetime I am sure that every ugly mofo has had at least 3 deceptively decent looking photos taken of them. And then 100's more that show what they ACTUALLY look like. So pick a couple of those and throw em up there. ~Why do so many of you guys take pictures IN the driver's seat of your car?! I just don't get it... ~ People take pictures of themselves in the bathroom because there is a mirror in there... I honestly don't see what the big deal is. So GET OVER IT! And quit talking shmack about what every other guy does on meetville. How do you even know anyway...? (Plus mirror pics make a lot more sense than in a car...) ~IF you do take a mirror pic, please be smarter than the mirror... If you move your head and/or body and/or phone a little bit I PROMISE there are literally endless combinations of ways to stand that don't require your ENTIRE FACE be blocked out by your phone. But again, thanks for pointing out your dreadful lack of intelligence right-off-the-bat.5. Content: Okay, clearly a lot of you "easy-going" and "laid back" fellas are into "anything outdoors" but you "are also cool with just staying in".....? But seriously, why can't I find any profiles mentioning how much you like laughing and having fun?! Personally, I hate fun of all sorts. Especially laughing. (that was of course...what? That's right. Sarcasm***last thing then I'm done...If you claim to not care about something and thus refuse to discuss it (ahem...religion or politics), this does NOT make you "open-minded". It pretty much makes you the opposite actually.Have an AWESOME day retards! ;D I like surprises... ;D ...and flying kites!

PERSONAL INFORMATION

  • Looking for

    man

  • Relationship

    Never married

  • Have kids

    No

  • Wants kids

    Someday

  • Ethnicity

    Caucasian

  • Faith

    Christian

  • Body type

    Slim

  • Height

    5'7"

  • Eye color

    Blue

  • Smoke

    Yes, socially

  • Drink

    Yes, socially

INTERESTS

Horror War
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