• Arkansas City
• Kansas
• United States

Offline

Woman. 32 years old. Zodiac sign: Sagittarius.

Looking for: man. In age: 29-39

I make mistakes, I'm not perfect, I'm out of control, sometimes a lil crazy, and at times hard to handle, but if you can't handle me at my worst, you sure as hell don't deserve me at my best.As with material possessions or professional achievements, relationships give our ego a method by which to identify who we are to the outside world. The problem is that we attach so much of our identity to the external appearance of our relationships that we lose touch with the parts of ourselves that are wise and conscious. The attachment to this false identity leads to a feeling of desperation rather than fulfillment. After all, without the relationship, or the job, or whichever other false identity we have chosen, who would we be? Besides the ego identification, it's easy to develop a dependency on companionship. That independent person that we once were starts to evaporate. Our mind becomes fogged and as our self-identification begins to attach itself to the other person, unconsciously or consciously, we become afraid to lose that person. We become dependent on that person and fearful of loneliness. Out of our emotional insecurities, we start to become needy and to seek out validation from our partner. So, *** focusing on the celebration of love and partnership, it becomes a game of how to protect ourselves from loss. Out of a desire to avoid appearing needy and out of a fear of losing our partner, we start to filter what we say. In doing so, we do not communicate our needs clearly, openly or bravely. We somehow become convinced that our partner will magically know what to do to fulfill our needs. When our needs are not met, we secretly blame the other person and begin to resent them. When we are unhappy, our partner will pick up on the clues, and in turn, secretly resent us, thus starting a vicious cycle in the silent destruction of a romantic partnership. So much of what needed to be said was not said, and bad feelings are bottled up and start to accumulate for both parties. Have you ever had a friend come to you and complain about all of the things they are unhappy about with their partner? Those are the kinds of things they should be telling their partner, if they actually want a change. Worse yet is when one partner openly communicates their needs only to find that the other party is simply not listening, or does not fully acknowledge what was said, or makes them feel guilty for having those needs. Deep down, we are all really good people. But this doesn't mean that any combination of two good people will make a good partnership. There is such thing as a bad fit, and it is okay to admit it. The best fits are ones where the most important values for both people are met. They must have life goals that align with one another and have a mutual attraction, understanding, and level of respect for each other. Both people must be committed to making the partnership their top priority. Sometimes, even when we realize that our relationship isn't a good fit, we justify staying in it with what seem like logical reasons. We may feel that we won't find another person who accepts and loves us as much as the current partner. Or we may be afraid to be alone, so we simply settle by default. Each time we are reminded of the bad fit, we brush it under the rug and distract ourselves with some other thought. We may feel that we are doing a service to the other person by staying in the relationship, but in reality, we are hurting them by not being honest with them and ourselves. And we are accumulating bad feelings and bad energy in our inner space. The problem comes when we find ourselves in a relationship and we are constantly comparing our partners with this conjured-up "perfect" person. When that happens, we stop appreciating our partner for all the beautiful qualities they do possess. The truth is this perfect person does not exist. More importantly, we may not actually need all of these qualities in a partner to be extraordinarily happy. What we need is to identify the most important qualities that we must have in order to feel satisfied and fulfilled . By not having identified the must-have qualities in our chosen life partner, we end up settling, and since the person cannot give us the things we truly need, we start to resent them. This will snowball into larger issues. In life, we will get random results if we have not specified what we want. Identifying and understanding what it is that we need in a relationship, allows us to set clear intentions, and in doing so, moves us closer to realizing our intended desires. I'm up for anything fun.........

• Arkansas City
• Kansas
• United States

Offline

Woman. 32 years old. Zodiac sign: Virgo.

Looking for: man. In age: 29-39

I own my own residental cleaning company, I love doing what I do and I have fun doing it! I am an Independent women who takes care of myself and my daughter. People say I am...easy to talk to,fun, caring,trust worthy, love to make people laugh,kind hearted and hard working, and I must agree! I love going out and having a good time, I try to make the best out of every situation! I love to cook and spend time with my family and friends(they are all kinda awesome). I enjoy all kinds of music but if you look on my ipod you will find a lot of country and old school music (everyone needs to jam out to the music from good old days). Other than that I am from MA and have been here for just over 8 but still a New Englander at heart.!! If you have any questions just ask or drop me a line to say Hi! It depends on the person,I am a very simple person. Some place where we can talk and have fun!

• Arkansas City
• Kansas
• United States

Offline

Woman. 35 years old. Zodiac sign: Aries.

Looking for: man. In age: 32-42

Im a confident, cool, easy going, and fun to be around kinda girl. I enjoy music, football, and having a good time. And I am a girly girl in all the good ways.. Get my nails done, hair done, look good, smell good, and I love shoes! You know... the good stuff :) And not so much in the bad... I hate drama and wining.... got no room for it.I am a mother to a beautiful 5 year old she is my life and I enjoy every minute of it! My family is also very important to me, we all hang out and get along very well.I love going to concerts and live music of any kind. As long as it has a good beat, I'll rock to it. I love the SUN!! So camping, the beach, and being outdoors are things I enjoy. Not gonna lie.... I hate being cold! Unless its at a football game! GO UTES!! :)Im looking for someone to be around and have a good time with. Someone that loves to laugh and that knows how to take a joke. Life's too short to take everything so serious... Someone that enjoys staying in cuddling :) and going out on the town too. Someone with goals. No more losers for me... If that sounds like it could be you, hit me up!