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Jem, 40

Offline, last seen Sat, 04 May 2024 10:37:32

About Me

I prefer quiet evenings with a special someone that I can have a good conversation with. I love to read and watch movies and I can cook you a meal that will knock your socks off! My fried chicken and my biscuits and gravy will make your toes curl and your back arch. Well, my cooking is good, but not quite that good....it was a trick question :-) I am divorced after 21 years of marriage and I have no pets but I do have 2 "generally" loveable teenage sons, and both of them are house broken so that's a definite plus. I have a great sense of humor and I speak fluent (friendly) sarcasm as a 2nd language. I enjoy country and classic rock and also enjoy classical music from time to time. Although a social drinker, I am not a fan of noisy bars or big crowds. I would offer to take you to dinner theater long before I would offer to take you to a Chief's game. I am not a sports fan nor do I watch TV so if you want to attend a lot of ballgames or discuss TV shows I'm definitely not your guy. The boys and I love to attend Sporting KC games and that is my one indulgence in the wide-wide world of sports. Although I am a white collar professional I am still a small town country boy at heart and would much rather eat at a hole-in-the-wall place with awesome food than have an over-;The Plaahhhhhzlaaaa" as the yuppies pronounce it).I love to hold hands and hug and I hope that you do too...if you do not like to touch and show affection in public that is a deal breaker for me. Physical stimulation is awesome, but I also need someone that can stimulate me intellectually. You do not have to work for NASA, but you should be able to carry on an interesting conversation with me that does not revolve around sports, celebrities, TV shows etc. I am definitely not Mr. Regular Joe so I realize that finding you is going to take some time but will be well worth it in the future. If you have any questions please message me and ask!!! Nothing ventured, nothing gained. If I do not reply please do not be offended, I am just trying to save both of us time, and remember that whether or not we decide to proceed is 50% up to you and also 50% up to me.;the one". I am ready to begin a new journey with someone by my side, taking baby steps to see where the path leads us, helping each other become the best version of ourselves and seeing new places and learning things along the way. I need a partner in crime, and at the same time I need someone to pull me from my shell occasionally. I am complex in my simplicity.;when we can get away with it", and at other times I will sit across the table from you and be the perfect picture of innocence... almost like an angel. Almost :-;-work drink.I have two sons (The Hellions) and they are good boys and have a keen sense of humor just like their father. One is 19 and lives with me, the other is 15 and lives with us on Wednesdays and every other weekend.;why did you pick HIM?!?". Trust me on this. Also, the three of us are a package deal, so be prepared for that. If you clip coupons and like bargains, consider this a "3 for the price of 1". There will be times when you will go out with all three of us and it will be an interesting evening "I guarantee it, or your money back". Both Hellions are single. If you have cute daughters you have been forewarned. I do not curse like a sailor but I do curse. If that is a deal breaker I would rather you know that upfront. I will drop the f*ck bomb on occasion. Oops. See? I do have a filter and I will not curse in front of your mother. If your mother is no longer with us I am truly sorry...I know how special the mother-daughter bond can be. I lost my father in ***and I still feel the void every day.In meetville parlance I "smoke often" however I do not smoke in my home and my car does not reek of smoke.Please do not send me pictures of your boobs. I saw a real pair once, years ago, and I thought they were pretty cool. I am sure yours are lovely too, and if you say you have breasts I will take your word for it, no need to send me a picture to prove it. I’m not trying to buy a 4 wheel drive truck from you so I don’’m just looking for a date. You have my solemn promise that I will not send you any freaky photos.I am definitely not looking for a wife, but I am looking for a committed relationship with the right person. I will have to date numerous people to find Her and I am okay with that....I am in no hurry and when I do meet Her I will know pretty quickly. After a 21 year marriage I simply want to meet someone to spend some time with. I work full time, I spend over 90 minutes a day commuting to and from work, I am involved with my church and serving on boards for our local community and I run a household with all that entails. I also enjoy some time alone. It does not leave much time for “us” but if you and I hit it off I will offer all of myself to you that I possibly can. I know you are busy too and I will not make unreasonable demands on your time. I am not saying this to be rude, I just want you to know that, like yours, my free time is pretty limited.The Fine Print; If you meet any of the following criteria please do not contact me:Your face looks like a pin cushion and you call it a “fashion statement”. Tattoos and minimal piercings are perfectly acceptable.You need money/a loan/a handout: Just because I work at a bank does not mean I am a bank. There are over 2.5 million ATM machines in the world (trust me, I just Googled this) so I’m pretty sure there is one near you. Find it, and it will spit 20 dollar bills at you like a camel spits water. Problem solved.You just want to get laid - I don't want to catch whatever you have. I've waited this long, another year won't kill me.You are an emotional train wreckYou cannot spell or master basic grammar. If I reply to you it is only because I am fixing all of your spelling errors. I did not major in Archaeology and I cannot read hieroglyphics. By now there is only one girl left still reading this, and you are her. Please contact me immediately so we can meet for coffee or a drink! I promise to make you laugh, giggle, and forget about “life” for a while….kind of like a bubble bath without the bubbles :-) How about we meet first for coffee or a drink and then take it from there?

PERSONAL INFORMATION

  • Looking for

    woman

  • Relationship

    Divorced

  • Have kids

    No

  • Wants kids

    No

  • Ethnicity

    Caucasian

  • Faith

    Christian

  • Body type

    Average

  • Height

    6'0"

  • Eye color

    Blue

  • Smoke

    Yes, regularly

  • Drink

    Yes, socially

INTERESTS

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stars 4.1 out of 5 based Rated 4.1 / 5 Based  on  377 reviews
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