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Oswaldo, 33
United States, New Jersey, Franklinville

Offline, last seen Tue, 09 Sep 2025 22:20:16

About Me

SWM in non-existant job seeks hostile woman for tepid sex, hustling, and mutual psychological torture. I enjoy drinking, smoking, pornography, and self-righteous indignation. I used to think I was indecisive, but now I'm not too sure. I can't stand movies, and the last album I bought was The Elvis Presley Revival Band's Greatest Hits. Way down deep, I'm very shallow. I have middling intelligence but try to appear smarter by affecting a world-weary air, memorizing pointless quotes of classical works, and chuckling at my own mean-spirited, agenda-driven jokes. I'm 31, but look 58 and feel 65. I'm looking for a fun evening that doesn't end in a puddle of vomit or at the emergency room. I am looking for a good time and a few laughs that have nothing to do with your nude photos. I'm not holding my breath, but I am looking for interesting conversation with someone that will not have to be quoted later on in a courtroom.YOU: You are a man-hating, bitter shrew with a misplaced sense of entitlement and unrealistic expectations. In time you will become coolly hostile when I don't fulfill every unmet need you've ever had. You feel very strongly about woman's rights and equality when it suits your purpose. You filled your profile with generalities, and yet you expect guys to guess what you are interested in when writing to you. Extra credit if you just finished dating every guy in town but now want to take your time with me. For our first date we should head over to Wal- You wouldn't have to get all dressed up an stuff, I could find out what your favorite color was and you could find out if I blush when we walk through the lingerie section. I would be open to an unsatisfying fling that leaves me filled with regret and dread but prefer a long-term, soul crushing descent into booze and pills. Age unimportant, but I will condescend to women under 20 and rehash mother issues with women over 49, serious replies please…P.S. This hopefully made you laugh because it is fictitious. I think a good first meet up would be for coffee and figure out if we click. I'm old school and a first date needs to be asked in person.

PERSONAL INFORMATION

  • Looking for

    woman

  • Relationship

    Never married

  • Have kids

    No

  • Wants kids

    Someday

  • Ethnicity

    Caucasian

  • Faith

    Christian

  • Body type

    Average

  • Height

    5'7"

  • Eye color

    Green

  • Smoke

    No

  • Drink

    No

INTERESTS

Rap Playing Cards Caribbean Mexican Ice Hockey Play Sport Games
Wink Icon color PERSONAL INFORMATION Fave
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SIMILAR PEOPLE

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stars 4.1 out of 5 based Rated 4.1 / 5 Based  on  377 reviews
  • Franky from Franklinville | Man | 26 years old | Cancer
    Franky

    Online

    Man. 26 years old. Zodiac sign: Cancer.

    Looking for: woman. In age: 18-21

    Hi! My name is Franky. I am never married catholic caucasian man without kids from Franklinville, New Jersey, United States. Now I'm looking for new relationships. I want to meet a woman, love of my life.

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  • Horacio from Franklinville | Man | 31 years old | Taurus
    Horacio

    Offline

    Man. 31 years old. Zodiac sign: Taurus.

    Looking for: woman. In age: 28-38

    ! just want to find a cool girl to kick it with when our schedules match up. Im a plumber so my schedule is pretty unpredictable. Also am a die-hard 49ers fan but if your a Raiders fan I could deal with it just cuz I will be able to talk more ish than u lol.Ive been looking for a good girl to cuddle up with that loves watchin movies or sports. If you love camping and fishing, we could just pitch a tent and fish all night long. My taste in music ranges from old Tu-Pac and E***Tribe Called Quest, Outkast, ***Mafia to the new Jeezy and ofcourse some Usher for when Im in the "mood". I also am into alot of hard rock like Breaking Benjamine, Volbeat, Slipknot, old Slayer, Pantera and Trapt. I grew up in the woods so I love the outdoors. Camping is one of my absolute favorite things to do, spring, summer, winter fall, I don't care. It would be cool to find a girl that knows where all the good hiking is. I'm very loyal to all my friends (girlfriends')who show me the same respect. Im a firm believer in you reap what you sow and surrounding myself with good positive people. I love a girl thats got attitude but not conceited. She has to have a good since of humor cuz IM a prankster. Lol Also, I need a girl that can have an inteligent conversation, you know, someone that can teach me something too. Hit me up if you want to know more. Whatever you want to do.

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  • Geordie from Franklinville | Man | 34 years old | Gemini
    Geordie

    Offline

    Man. 34 years old. Zodiac sign: Gemini.

    Looking for: woman. In age: 31-41

    I used to have this super long (and extremely amusing) description in here - Funny, charming, witty, blah, blah, blah.. All of the stuff that I want to share with someone, but absolutely detest the idea of this being an online resume into my psyche. A) I hate talking about myself B) I love a good mystery C) I've to got leave a little for your imaginationSo... Let the mystery begin. I'm an open book, with as many chapters as you're willing to read, but I must say, if you get started, you may never put this book down. Here is my preface. I am successful, both in business, and in life. I am almost the funniest person I know. I work a lot, and love every second of it. If you spend any time with me, I'm sorry, and you're welcome. Total romantic. Big dreamer. Big doer. Will try almost anything once. Very much a communicator. I appreciate all of the important things in life, but it will be up to you to learn what the important things in my life are. I look forward to hearing from you, if any of this sparks your interest... if not, I wish you the best in your adventures! What would I do on a first date? Hmm... There are so many options, I guess it would definitely have to depend on the woman. I love new experiences, and I am a sucker for a random adventure, but my idea of a great first date is really getting to know you a bit. Simple and no pressure.. The second though, be prepared, because we will definitely be doing something awesomely awesome. :)

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