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Yolande, 31

Online

About Me

Little April was not the best student in Sunday school. Usually she slept through the class.One day the teacher called on her while she was napping, "Tell me, April, who created the universe?"When April didn't stir, little Johnny, a boy seated in the chair behind her, took a pin and jabbed her in the rear. "GOD ALMIGHTY!" shouted April and the teacher said, "Very good" and April fell back asleep.A while later the teacher asked April, "Who is our Lord and Saviour," But, April didn't even stir from her slumber. Once again, Johnny came to the rescue and stuck her again. 'JESUS CHRIST!" shouted April and the teacher said, "very good," and April fell back to sleep.Then the teacher asked April a third question. "What did Eve say to Adam after she had her twenty-third child?" And again, Johnny jabbed her with the pin. This time April jumped up and shouted, "IF YOU STICK THAT F*****G THING IN ME ONE MORE TIME, I'LL BREAK IT IN HALF AND STICK IT UP YOUR a***!"The Teacher fainted.

PERSONAL INFORMATION

  • Looking for

    man

  • Relationship

    Never married

  • Have kids

    No

  • Wants kids

    Someday

  • Ethnicity

    Caucasian

  • Faith

    Christian

  • Body type

    Average

  • Height

    5'1"

  • Eye color

    Brown

  • Smoke

    Yes, regularly

  • Drink

    No

INTERESTS

SIMILAR PEOPLE

Great
stars 4.1 out of 5 based Rated 4.1 / 5 Based  on  377 reviews
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    Woman. 34 years old. Zodiac sign: Leo.

    Looking for: man. In age: 31-41

    I love every season of the year. I enjoy the fresh air, I always feel so invigorated after a day outside.I have a son and daughter that mean the world me. I come from a big family and love to hang out with them all. We always have so much fun and we are very welcoming to anyone joining in the fun with us. So I'm looking for someone who's not afraid to jump right in.I tend to put others before myself. I would love to be with someone who enjoys doing the little things that make me feel special, put me first sometimes or open a door for me once in a while. I believe it is the little things in life that count.I love to laugh. Will you keep me smiling and laughing? I think that if you can make eachother smile and laugh everyday then you will never be bored. Laughter is the best medicine.A ball game is fun, I love to feel the excitement at the ball park, it's exhilerating. I'm not so great at playing sports but I am up for a game of mini golf or anything you might have the patience to try with me. I am always open to new ideas for fun and excitement. I'd love to try something new with you if you want to show me the way. I am a fast learner and with the company of someone great I am sure to enjoy the fun.I can be shy at times but when I get to know you, I will open right up. I can be loads of fun!! Do you want to join me? I tend to be shy at first. Something casual is more comfortable for me. Meeting somewhere to hang out or near water to walk and talk is always a good start...

  • Marta

    Online

    Woman. 31 years old. Zodiac sign: Pisces.

    Looking for: man. In age: 28-38

    Myself – restless, analytical, and opinionated. I am not offended by a dirty joke and can dish out one of my own. I am independent but far from being a feminist. Sarcasm is a spice of life, so bring it on. . Love my life and everything that comes with it. I was blessed with great family and friends who make me a better person every day just being around them. Just to top it off I'd like to find a great guy. I prefer a mans man. If you own a pair of skinny jeans it won't workout between us.* I'm not interested in one night stands or what your fetishes might be if that sounds like you please don't message meWhat’s your story? What are you greatest pet-peeves? Anywhere where we can talk and have fun. Jays game?

  • Rebeca

    Online

    Woman. 33 years old. Zodiac sign: Taurus.

    Looking for: man. In age: 30-40

    My hobbies are dancing, reading, the beach, movies, music, and traveling as often as I can. Just got back from the trip of a lifetime in Europe! I am very interested in surfing and scuba diving but don't get to very often. Huge fan of trivia games, I have a mind filled with random things. About me- I'm pretty easy going, down to earth. I have a great sense of humor- can be very dry, sarcastic, but also just silly (looking for the same in a date). I laugh a lot- sometimes at things I shouldn't. I like to hang out with friends doing anything from watching a movie, going to a restaurant, or even a trip to somewhere for the weekend. I'm a very quick learner. I love roller coasters and the feeling of falling. I work hard when I have to and relax when I don't. Right now my iPod playlist has Adele, F.U.N. I think an amusement park or something fun and engaging is a great way to get to know someone.

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