Sofia, 34
Offline, last seen Thu, 02 May 2024 00:02:04
About Me
I'm looking for the right partner, not just a partner for right now. Relationships take work and commitment, but they also need common ground and goals.I generally receive a lot of messages here. Certainly more than many of my male friends who have profiles. That being said, I've noticed a trend. I get a lot of messages from people with the bare minimum of a profile that simply say "Hi" or "Your [sic] pretty". These short messages and the generally unsatisfactory quality of communication that results, led me to add a character limit on initial *** know some of the great guys might not be so wordy, but I'm pretty verbose as you'll note from the length of my profile and there is a TON of stuff you could ask about or comment on. Tell me about you and why you think we might fit, please? You're busy, I'm busy... let's make sure we're on the same page from the get go. I appreciate the compliments, but if you've read my profile you might glean that complimenting my looks isn't going to get you far, at least not without some other content. I like compliments (like most women), but there is a LOT more to me than the surface. The partner I'm looking for will see that. Another trend I've noticed is 'ping pong', a dozen messages back and forth and what appears to be no actual intent on meeting in person. So, I'm laying it on the line right now, right here. If you're interested and we've chatted via messages here, we should get a cup of coffee in person. There is zero point in spending a lot of time getting to know each other online if there is no chemistry in person and/or no way of verifying the other person is who they say they are. I know I'm real, but you have no way of knowing that until we meet. Right? I'm a pretty great girl who through some magnificent twists of fate has been happily single for the past few years, there have been a few intermittent periods of dating but I haven't found a match that really clicks with me and the direction my life is headed in the long term. Some of the twists of fate were amazing, positive experiences and others were more difficult. However, I've stayed unattached because I haven't found the right person...and you can't find the right person if you're attached to the wrong one. Timing can be everything in whether a match works or doesn't, I've been thwarted by that particular demon too many times to get involved with someone I know isn't the right match for the long haul. I know how wonderful the right fit can be in a relationship, so I am reluctant to be in the wrong fit, I refuse. I wouldn't wear a pair of shoes that were the wrong size, why would I settle for the wrong fit in my personal life? I'd rather be single and satisfied with my life, then tied down to someone who is distracting me from my goals. Dating is a trial and error thing, sometimes I'll make a great new friend and sometimes...not so much. Yes, I know what I'm looking for, but it isn't a checklist. I don't care if you have blond hair or blue hair; drive a sports car or a 60s Bug; are an artist or an engineer. I do care about your personality, honesty and ability to be real. If we don't have the same 'end game', no amount of force will make anything work...at least not in the long run. I'm an artist and as such am pretty right brained, yet I've also worked very successfully and happily as an office manager and book keeper (very left brained). I prefer to be able to be spontaneous but have found a certain amount of planning does help make things go smoother and is often necessary in this era with jobs and outside responsibilities. I have one child currently living at home, he's 17. My daily lifestyle is much closer to that of a childless person than that of a parent of young children, except during my younger kids' vacations. I'm open to dating someone with children, but not open to playing mommy to younger kids. If your kids are under 10, I don't know if it will work. I've gotten rather used to the amount of freedom that comes with not having to be home for an 8:30 bedtime. ;-) That doesn't mean it won't work, it just has to be the right connection between us to make it a non-issue. I came to the conclusion while I was traveling (6 months out of the US), that while "things" are nice (I do enjoy and adore my iPhone and Kindle), I would be happier with a simpler life in general. I started thinking about the food we eat here and how commercial farming (and grocery stores) distance us from our food supply; How the tv keeps us distracted from the important things happening in our own lives and in our government...There are bigger issues than the latest episode of The Walking Dead (which I do love). I want nothing more than to move to some land in the country and build a home if there isn't on already there... and raise the livestock that will eventually be on the dinner table and grow the majority of the produce that we eat. So, that's my plan. That's the direction I'm headed. I also want to put in space for various arts and a kitchen designed for teaching cooking. I'm not a fancy cook, but "Organic peasant" would describe the hearty, wholesome food I most enjoy eating and preparing. If I meet the right life partner who already has the land/lifestyle, AWESOME. Anyone I get involved with seriously will be heading the same direction...I'm not interested in wasting time in the wrong fit. If I don't meet the right person, I'm going to do it on my own because I know I'm happier when I'm doing something I care about. Until I get my land, I'm doing what I can within the limits of the 'rules' of our fair city. I have 4 chickens, who are finally laying...well at least some of them are...2 eggs a day now, so I think I'm down to my last purchased dozen for a while. :-) I have a fair sized garden which has produced a fair amount of veggies for us this summer...although I should have planted twice as much broccoli and three or four times as many peas and beans. I'm building a Quonset hut style greenhouse to try to extend my growing season. I like having organic greens 25' from my backdoor and I'd love to have access to fresh "off season" summer veggies. I'm keeping busy. I'm active. I'm eating right. I'm happy. If I'm single for the next 5 years, well that will be disappointing because it will mean I haven't met the right person, but it doesn't mean my life will have been on pause. I don't know if I'll live 50 years more or 100, but I do know I'm going to do my damnedest to make the most of whatever amount of time I have and to enjoy it and be happy. Something reasonably casual, like coffee or lunch. Meeting someone online isn't meeting. It's meeting when you finally see each other in person...that is when you start to find out if there might be more of a connection or not.
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