It’s a common situation that plays out for so many of us. We’re in the thick of dating and we start to really feel happy who we’re with, and we lose all track of our pace. We throw ourselves into the relationship and it can actually work against us. If you’re not careful and you don’t pace yourself, then you may accidentally scare that other person off. So how can you ensure that you relax and keep yourself paced and chilled throughout the process?
It’s not always easy for when we find somebody that we really like, we want to dive in head first. We’re happy and we can see a future with this person and so we want to embrace the dating process for all that it can be. Though we may feel it instinctually that this is a good match for us, we still have to work at keeping our cool. This takes practice and also ensures that we find a way to talk ourselves through things, even when things are going really well.
So if you want to know what it takes to keep a good pace, here are some things to consider. These can be a lifesaver for preserving that potential relationship, or to working through the most common dating pitfalls and blowing it. Here’s how to keep your pace!
1. Give yourself a pep talk: If all else fails then you may need to talk yourself through the situation. Find some keywords that you can plant and revisit if you find that you are getting in too deep too fast. Talk yourself through things about keeping it cool and ensuring that you don’t get sucked in too quickly. It may sound like a mammoth task but if you want to ensure that your remain calm, then be ready and willing to give yourself a good pep talk. It will always work to help you and ensure that you stay on pace throughout.
2. Let them take the lead, especially at first: Though you may not want to be submissive in the relationship, if you have a tendency to get too excited too fast then slow it down on your end. Let them take the lead and make this a conscious effort so that you can relax a bit. Let them plan the dates and take the lead on making plans in the first place. Let them determine what you do next and try to just remain calm in the process. This doesn’t mean you don’t speak up at all, but it does mean that you find a way to relax and determine that they can lead you towards this pivotal period of time.
3. Take it slow and remind yourself of what all that includes in the relationship: Even if your instinct is telling you to move forward quickly, try hard to thwart that. Try to find a way to see things for what they are and remind yourself of the current status of the relationship. Recognize that taking it slow can really pay off, and try to revisit this recognition often. Write things down in a journal if you have to, but never put all your cards on the table. This is how to keep your pace and your wits about you, and to ensure that you are never in a bad situation again.